One of the most daunting tasks I have as a mother is explaining away the disingenuous behaviors of others.
If it sounds too good to be true, it is – there’s no “probably” about it. There’s an unfortunate downside to teaching my children to be men of integrity, who respect others and honor their words. They expect the same treatment in return. Teaching to be good and to do good must come with a cautionary warning: Most people don’t have integrity.
Since graduating high school, my middle son has sought out an interim post graduation program that will help him to develop as a student-athlete. Promises were made by well-known coaches and prestigious institution officials to secure his attendance at an elite prep school only to renege on every promise mid-season and usurp thousands of dollars and time that can never be recovered. A lawsuit worthy cause? Perhaps. My first priority, however, is to piece together the broken pieces of my son, his shattered dreams, cast cold-heartedly to the ground and discarded.
“Son, people are not who they seem, they are just people. Riddled with flaws and self-centered motivation.”
Shall I address the Bronx body shop, where my eldest son took his new car to tap out a dent that a fellow motorist caused while it was parked innocently on his college campus? As if the hit and run wasn’t enough, the body shop swapped several of his car’s factory-installed parts and replaced them with a few “chop shop specials”, unbeknownst to my son. Several weeks later, there is smoke rising from under the hood. “Don’t worry son, just bring it to the dealership and have it checked out.” Well, the underhanded work of the body shop was quickly uncovered. As for his new car warranty, well that was voided based on the unauthorized replacement of the factory-installed parts. Will the body shop owner ever admit what was done? Of course not. Will filing a formal complaint help recoup the financial losses associated with the unlawful act? Not likely. The burden of proof lies with you and unless you have video documentation of the theft by the shop mechanic, it is a waste of time. “Son, all people can not be trusted. Research, investigate and choose wisely. I wish I could protect you from every charlatan, every deceiver, every thief and heart-stealer. My dearest son, I’m so sorry that most people do not have integrity.”